On The Cosby Show, you were everyone’s sweetheart. Raven has been in the spotlight, performing for millions, since she was just three years old. The pressure to appear feminine was immense.
“You look very attractive tonight.”
“Thank you.”
There are so many unspoken rules. How cute can you be? How sexy can you be without being overtly sexual? I always knew my sexuality was a topic I couldn’t discuss.
What happened to Raven on The Cosby Show?
“I just black out. I would appreciate it if this didn’t get mentioned anywhere. I didn’t want to tell my parents. I knew I couldn’t say it out loud. But that kind of thing eats at your soul.”
Raven finally shares her story: The Dark Side of Being a Child Star
“I remember the smell of soul food coming from his dressing room. I remember opening the show, walking up those stairs, and coming down that iconic staircase. I remember playing with the wood before going down. But as soon as the camera starts, something in me clicks off, and I just do what I’m trained to do.”
When she was just three years old, Raven was already working to help support her family.
“My parents put me into modeling at a young age. My mom’s favorite show was The Cosby Show. One day, I saw the look on her face and said, ‘Hey, I can do what Rudy does.’ It was like playing grown-up games.”
“We watched you on The Cosby Show. You were the world’s sweetheart.”
When Raven was seven years old on the set of The Cosby Show, she was told that she was getting fat and wasn’t allowed to eat on set. As The Cosby Show was winding down, her father had to figure out what was next for her career to keep the bills paid, so she did a rap album.
Raven-Symoné, who started as a child star and became a teen superstar, seemed to be living every girl’s dream.
“I had the number one show on Disney. I had multiple albums. I’ve been on tour with NSYNC.”
But behind the scenes, Raven wasn’t happy.
“There was so much pressure. I always found it stressful. All I knew was how to recite words that other people wrote, the emotions I was supposed to have, and how to smile and take pictures for people.”
To support her family, Raven hid a heavy secret.
“I became aware of my sexuality at 12. I didn’t want to tell my parents because I felt I couldn’t say it out loud. I remember when Ellen came out, and the conversations were always negative. Seeing no positive examples, I feared losing my career if I spoke up.”
Rumors swirled that Raven-Symoné was dating her That’s So Raven co-star, Orlando Brown.
“Losing my virginity to a guy at that time was significant because I knew it would change my world. It was either him or never again.”
Hiding her true self was taking a toll on Raven.
“There was nothing that could make me deal with my issues then. Even if I got sick, I would take this secret to the grave. But it eats at your soul.”
“You had suicidal thoughts?”
“I can’t talk for periods of time. I don’t know how to get my words out, so I retreat into my mind, lie down, and sometimes cry.”
For years, Raven shut down to protect herself.
“I don’t remember scenes. As soon as the camera starts, something switches off. I black out until normal life resumes. It’s all bottled up. When I turned 18, I knew something was wrong, so I started therapy and learned it was dissociation.”
But eventually, Raven decided to prioritize herself.
“I retired from the industry. I had to overcome these internal programs because I’ve been entertaining since I was three. I went to college and felt free for the first time. I thought, ‘If I’m not in the industry, I can come out.’ I stopped hiding and felt a huge weight lifted. I am proud of who I am.”
However, someone she trusted betrayed her.
Raven-Symoné is now living happily after coming out, but Orlando Brown has tried to bring her down.
“He gave me… and then I gave him some ideas.”
“My feelings about Orlando Brown are a sense of loss. It’s very hard.”
When the truth about someone from her past was revealed, Raven knew what she had to do.
Bill Cosby was sentenced to three to ten years in prison and classified as a sexually violent predator. Some women felt saddened because The Cosby Show had been groundbreaking.
“I’m feeling really down. If it weren’t for him, so many women wouldn’t be dealing with depression right now. I want everyone who deserves justice to get it.”
By being true to herself, Raven found someone who loved her for exactly who she was.
“What made Miranda the one for me? I usually keep my stories to myself, but she knows just what to say to get me to open up. I feel so comfortable with her. She really understands me.”
When Raven returned to TV on her own terms, she was determined to make a difference. Back on the Disney Channel, “Raven’s Home” has been a big hit.
“Why did I go back to television? It felt right. I missed acting, and there’s an important message in the show.”
So, what’s the message?
“We all have secrets that eat away at us. It’s hard to tell your truth, but you shouldn’t keep these secrets hidden.”
“My main focus is on the kids. I tell them it’s important to know who you are, to take control of your self-worth, and to understand your value.”
“That’s the real power. Being yourself and letting other young people see that they can be themselves too. I’m so proud. This is what I know, and this is my way of giving back.”
